feminist conflicts

Two recent schizophrenic experiences I've had recently.  a) going to the darzi, and b) listening to grown men talk explicitly about their sexual experiences.

Going to the the darzi.  Has to be done, unless you can pull off shabby.  In Karachi no one pulls off shabby, and even the ones who can, choose not to.  Hence the twice a year visit to the tailor for which I have to be psychologically armed.  My tailor is conservative, the kind who finds in me a solid companion to lament the shameless fashions of the times -- low necks, backs, bra strap visibility as style not malfunction, lack of duppattas, tattoos on clothes- girls frustrated about looking more sexy than others in time for rishta season parade of horror.  I politely smile and nod.  Luckily for me, I am spared the hostility - as a Zia era bastard child, I adhere to sleeves, dupattas and unchopped pants.  Not because I am conservative or even modest, its a country specific conditioning.  I have no problem with the explicit fashions; in fact, students are welcome to come to my class without shoes or sleeves, and pierced tongues.  But I do have a problem with rishta season, and the frantic Marketing of girls at shadis which is behind all the fashion frenzy.  That, and of course the fact that I am supporting child labor because one of the workers at the shop is a child.  Is he going to school and do I have blood on my hands?

As my colleague at the law school says, its all Perception Karachi feminist, its all perception!  And I fire back, my eyes red, its not perception, corporate lawyer!  Phillip Morris is not perception.  Its lung cancer.  Tanneries are not perception. Its toxic waste.  There is a system of economic exploitation and its real.  Its a matter of degree, he says smiling inwardly, his eyes getting the glazed look that this person is a fringe radical and had she been at a law firm, She is SO fired!  I am not a fringe radical.  I recognize degrees, and I do not expect unrealistic boycotts, I reply.  And some point, we have to draw the line.  We have to differentiate and take positions.  Other wise everything becomes meaningless.

---
Here's the other feminist conflict I had.  I have noticed if you allow mature men the space to brag about their sexual encounters, sometimes they do.  I can't disclose the location or the people.  But 20 minutes into an innocuous conversation that began with the weather and minutiae we (me and friend) were sent roller coasting, unsolicited and for free, on a rather sexually explicit and detailed ride into Karachi Past.  The Rock and Rolling late sixties of Pakistan.  A time where the Excelsior rocked; strip clubs operated publicly and starlets from the West disrobed.  Beautiful girls from cities in the heart of Punjab exercised sexual liberation; and were promptly driven back to small cities for fetus extraction by sober and responsible moms.  And Zardaris did not control the level of venom in our hearts and on Geo - but were -- a kinda sweet, albeit landowning family, that lived atop Bambino cinema in a penthouse in an area that was wide and DHA like.  Men fell for and married flight attendants in tight skirts. (Those were quainter times)  The fight attendants turned out to be conniving, and took them to the cleaner charging 50K for a kiss and that too after being lawfully wedded - and used that money to feed starving family members.

Descriptions of encounters, in particular, this conversation could be potentially inappropriate if I were younger and vulnerable.  But I feel tough and impenetrable, and everything the world offers is material.  In the middle of the narrative, I was thinking, this is oral history of a convoluted, funny-petty, kind.  Fazli could have interviewed him for his book.  Karachi was a Playboy Paradise.  A mini Europe.  Drugs, Sex, Strip Clubs, coupled with Third World tin pot.  Everything that is now done at homes and gone underground, and infested with TB and inflation, was out in the open, only waiting for Zia to take a plunger to its innocent, debaucherous heart.  The stuff my father never shared with me but I found out anyway, snooping through drawers, at 8, in the quest for material.  They went to nude beaches in Germany in the 60s and cruelly told us, the General's bastards (only) adding to our lustful wish list -- fight tyranny, free women, go to nude beach....

The problem though with this kind of unsolicited bragging narrative is that it is not all post modern cuteness; what do you do when the interventionist inside you is twisting?  A jail guard offering his gorgeous, white-skinned daughter for the night.  For Sixty Rupees.  Promiscuity which gives bragging rights to the man forever with copyrights and title.  And shame disrepute, oblivion, silence and abortion for the fairer sex.    My friend, by this time, was looking positively pale.  The conversation shifted to executions.  And quite appropriately, it ended with a Zia quotation.  Its one thing to read about the King of Hudood, its quite another to hear about the experience of administrating corporal punishment for the mustachioed general.  Interior Sindhis were sturdier stuff and could take 15.  Urbanites collapsed after the second lash.  One day, The General called and asked about his most highly desirable political prisoners and he was assured.  They have everything.  A drawing room.  The Best meals.  Everything but "wine and women."  The general chuckled, and I feel like I can still hear him chuckle.

The last piece in our flawed generation's puzzle.  And we are forever scarred as we stare at its (now amusing) ugliness.


maza aaya?

Rant Year Five

Last week I visited the ruin that has become of Gandhi Garden.  What used to be a relatively nice, clean area adjacent to a portion of Lyari Naddi (trans) now looks like a slum itself.  The streets were narrower with numerous incursions, illegal car parkings, rampant businesses, and balconies falling outward.  The city had simply not met the housing needs for the increased mass of people in the area, but contractors had.  What used to feel like a PECHS felt like Ranchore Line area.  People looked unhealthy.  Many of the old homes were demolished to make room for hundreds of high rises.  Area was sunnier in the 80s.  In the 70s you could hear the lion roar within a kilometer.  The eternal "loosan wala" who I bought rabbit fodder from was still there like a phantom of his former self, or maybe even dead.

The city is shabby and derelict.  Its destitution reflects a similar trajectory in our elite: Big landlords have grown richer on land ownership.  The military has raped the country of its resources.  Industrialists have systematically denied labor its rights.  And elites have become more callous. When it stops hurting that there is massive injustice in society, you know you've hit a new moral low.   A whole section of society fails to see how they are partially responsible for the decay.  Being apolitical is a way of life.  Religion justifies status quo and the belief that land, title and capital is bestowed from above.  Social outrage is diffused and deflected from economic injustice to intolerance around matters of faith.

Parents from the school my children go to, ride away in latest jeeps, two guards and a maid in attendance.  A twelve year old boy on the school grounds wears a proud, apologetic smile.  On his back is his employer's little girl's bag.  He should be studying not working.   At the annual parents' lecture by  a Fulbright scholar on a child's social and moral development, only a third of the parents show up.  Some openly comment that the parents who showed up are those with a child up for admission next year.

Change never comes from the privileged anyway.  But in urban Pakistan, I feel, that even some of the liberal dialogue and mobilization that is common in perhaps the middle and upper middle class in the U.S. is not possible here. In the U.S., in elite schools and communities you will still see some awareness on environmental issues, consumer boycotts, rights of ethnic and religious minorities, civil liberties such as free speech, right to privacy, due process of the law.  Even if the elite are not able to change the status quo, think class, or dismantle systemic structures, there is a liberal dialogue around non economic equity.

But Pakistani elite have a special cancer that renders them impervious to even this --vain and unique in their insular mentality, and fueled by a growing bigoted religiosity, a break-down down of the public school, health, and social care system - and an extreme fend for yourself mentality.

Some traits --

An obsession with consumption where having a conscience only distract: Availability at high prices at large franchise stores a variety of foreign products.  Birthday parties replete with decorations, party favors, entertainment.  Inordinate narcissism in clothing. Access to the city's few swimming pools, lawns, and golf courses that are watered copiously to stay lush.  Extravagant wedding banquets with in house tandoors and shrimp;  a tacky addiction to shaadis.  New fetish for luxury camps set up at the beach.   More toys for the children, and a vicious competitiveness around who has acquired what.  High end brands purchased online.  Children clad in Children's Place and Baby Gap.  Homes in newly developed army housing schemes which are bigger, but not environmentally friendly.  Gated communities of Dubai like apartments with their very own back-up of electricity and limo services.

A pretense that the poor survive because of them.  That they provide jobs and they are consumers for the products that they make.  The child servant is acceptable as they are saving the child from a life of poverty in a village where his family could scarcely feed him  That it is okay to not issue a worker a social security card in a factory because at least he has a job.  An excessive pride in philanthropy; self glorification over seeing oppression.

A hatred of the working class and Women.  Its common to not share utensils with domestic help.  At offices too, utensils are separated by jobs, and explained as hygiene.  At the workplace, bosses will remind their employees of their station in life.  Pashtun boys rummage through trash, and carry home gigantic sacks containing bits of paper and plastic retrieved with gloveless hands.  They blend with the Prados in that violent equilibrium of third world cities.  The two coasts of Ibrahim Hyderi - one, a club with manicured gardens; the other, a fishing village where a smell of dead chicken and rotting fish mixes nauseatingly, and toilets flow out of peoples' homes. Talking about disparity is not cool; people feel its tough enough having to live around poverty.  Sexual harassment is permitted.  Men seem like perverts, predators, or pedophiles,

A fair share of liberals who are more like self absorbed self actualizers:  There are those who read Mohsin Hamid,  listen to Sufi kalam, learn Kathak, and attend charity balls for the leprosy center.  There are those who will tell you about the ills of soda and whether cranberry justice has any cranberries.  They own paintings of Guljee and even know who Amean J or HM Naqvi is.  They will go as far as support the cause of Mukhtaran Mai (in living rooms) and play volleyball to preserve the heritage of old Karachi.  But they will mistreat servants, cut corners to reach Oxford, and frightfully scramble to find boutique ways to make more money.  They like hosting Indian liberals, and often fail to see that some of these liberals are Marxist, or at the very least, radical, and are quiet out of politeness and ignorance.  They pay lip service to Taseer, but not to the Christians of Gojra.  They tweet about Karachi's hidden treasures, but have long since abandoned the people of Bottle Bazaar.

There is no Rohinton Mistry in Pakistan.   But we have Ardeshir Cowasjee who, at least, keeps an eye out for illegal construction.  But a lack of cool Parsis aside, dialogue, we have none.

Meanness:  Lack of social etiquette; a phobia about talking to anyone you perceive as socially lower than yourself.  Competitiveness and a sense of sorority girl - late by a decade or two - attitude I heard my six year play act conversation between two girl - I won't invite you to my house because your house is not as big as mine.

Its no surprise that I am burnt out from having to interact with these parasites for a good portion of the day.  Brief break from activism notwithstanding, I have to be better prepared for this cult of negativity around me.  Got to do my homework, focus on the work.  Year Five in Pakistan.  New Year's resolution.  No longer trying to be nice to people who are privileged shit heads, and walk around the planet with the most enormous egos.  If you can't beat them, at least stop being civil to them.

Why for you do that Veena?

We supported Veena when she spoke against sexual abuse in her famous exchange with Maulana Mufti, but now she has gone too far.  Exposing for male consumption does not represent independence, enhance womens' rights, or promote feminism.  

True, FHM sounds like a typical Maxim type sleaze fest for male consumption, some humor, some nudes, some intelligence thrown in for the guy who works out. But this picture, specifically, has been consumed by men, women, Indians and Pakistani, and stimulated some essays in the Guardian.  It represents the next level in the Veena Malik Discourse.  When a woman strips bare, the magazine's profit margins aside, this may be a symbolic rejection of the implicit patriarchal control society exerts over womens' bodies and their sexuality -- and in this case, the rejection is happening in the context of the vehemence and misogyny directed at a Muslim girl from a middle class family who did not do the right thing - broke into the entertainment industry, got some freak luck, and capitalized on it - all the while igniting a national debate on nudity and taboos in our society.  Really, she's done a mouthful.

But isn't there a better way to debate womens' issues and taboos than the clichéd, redundant, intellectually un-liberating rejection of your panties?

Point well taken.  But we would not be talking about it with such focus and passion.  Nudity never goes out of fashion.  Its not slave to long, short, loose or tight -- well, because its nudity.  Nudity does not always confirm patriarchy or the male gaze.  Nudity will not be kosher because it is simply consumed by good women, nor can we deny the pleasure men get from viewer ship because that would be fascistic.  (Having said that, no woman wants to be with a man who has an unusual interest in naked pictures.  So no need to hide in boy gene arguments.)  Discomfort with nudity is legitimate because of the blatant commodification of women's bodies in an economy largely controlled by men, targeted for a male audience, and depicting women in demeaning ways.  In a socialist feminist utopia, there would be nudity, but no pornography;  the latter is a pictorial industry that markets violence, affirms heteronormativity, seeks to put women in their place, and isn't ashamed of intersecting it with race, class, ethnicity, nationality, age and even war to make it vile and delicious  -- hence the fascination with wanting to see an accomplished woman, say, an aeronautical engineer, bent over naked cleaning a toilet -- fetish, Asian, women looking fearful, needy, vulnerable-- porn.   In other words, porn will be boring and unsellable in the conventional sense because it doesn't it does play on our guiltiest, basest sex notions of who we are.  Perhaps we will have to re-imagine sexuality minus all the "isms" that makes it so exciting for some and all.

But its the naked body of a Pakistani, Muslim woman.  Its the mock capital Indian FHM generated by  poking fun at our notions of honor.  Its debasing our identity as Pakistanis.  Its the new cold war, except its hotter.

Yes, from FHM's side - a cynical, deliberate, pornographic exploitation.  Its not her naked body that sells.  Its the naked body of a Pakistani, Muslim woman that they have, arguably, purchased for a price, and poked fun at our notions of chastity and honor.  We wish Veena was making a statement that co-opted and inversed the perverse financial appeal of the shot- but there may not be any.  Except by default -- we are now in a Veena discourse of a higher level, and she has provided this space where everyone is tuning in -- to spew hatred, enjoy viciously, but perhaps also to think about things they have never thought about before - perhaps even question how in preserving antiquated notions of honor and jingoism - we uphold a military-industrial patriarchal complex. 

Well then, if she posed naked, she should have the guts to face it.  Yeh kiya baath hui?  Why the token lawsuit when its about your birth suit?

Veena is not the perfect humanist, secularist, feminist we would like her to be.  Why impose our notions of ethics and valor on to her?  She is subject to her whims and frailities; she could be second guessing, regretting,  capitalizing further, or being genuine.  Maybe she did not read the fine print.  Maybe the nude shot was to be left out.  Maybe the magazine was deceptive and purposely unclear on this one provision.  And she flew out in a haste without ironing out the details.  Who knows?  Veena having an ambiguous personal position, by denying or proclaiming full nudity immoral, should not make the political issue murky.

Okay fine- she should have done it for some valiant issue like breast cancer, or against domestic violence and enforced prostitution.

India and Pakistan play a deranged and embittered turf battle on the bodies of impoverished fishermen who inadvertently cross sea territories and are jailed for months at end.  Would a progressive magazine carry a cover picture of fishermen's families standing naked for the cameras, appealing for release, and making a powerful symbolic statement?   Should.  Nudity for a higher cause.  But not everything happens in our neat, political conceptualization of the world.  Nonetheless, the Pakistan womens' movement should recruit her after they are done feeling squeamish and sanitizing their hands with Dettol.

She is distracting from the issues.  We have NATO attacking; we have inflation, and most recently an LBOD peoples's tribunal I bet you never heard about.

But that's an argument whether Veena bares or not.  She is not distracting or detracting from the issues.  The issues are not considered anyway in our feudal military oligarchy.  Its not like political meetings on IMF and World Bank were cancelled because of this new agenda item.  Lets talk about it.  Lets move on.  But lets not all shoot the messenger.